Mantown, USA

After preparing for Thanksgiving, we took a week’s sabbatical from cooking and writing.  I did most of my writing in my sleep and Kris did most of her cooking while we were out to eat.  I’m happy to say, though, that we are back, cooking with fire, and preparing for her Xmas baking marathon.  Tonight was the warm-up.

Whether it’s time for breakfast or dessert, my salty-sweet craving chases me like a giant boulder on iron rails.  Potato chips and ice cream usually help my hankering, but Kristen recovered information pertaining to the existence of a legendary combination, the golden idol of baking, one thought lost in the recipe books: chocolate and bacon.

Our excavation of ingredients begins with bacon, a staple in our home.  If its hallowed aroma is not in the air every Saturday, something has gone horribly wrong.  Typically we go for the center cut variety.  But this time, only the thick cut has the resolve for a journey this epic.When the bacon starts to sizzle I am reminded of Indiana Jones’s fear of snakes.  These thick pieces hiss and curl in the heat, but I remain unafraid.

Once the snakes are slain stiff, I sneak a bite of the salty pork relics.   I don't do it a second time because, in a glance, she reminds me of her knife close at hand.

Next, she starts to mix the batter.  Once it moves out of the bowl and into the mixer I divert my attention back to the living room and turn up the volume on Raiders of the Lost Ark.

It’s at the part of the movie when Indiana Jones and Sallah discover the Map Room leading to the Well of Souls.  I look back into the kitchen.  Kristen stands with the rolling pin in her hand as if it is the Staff of Ra, shining a light towards the location of the burial chamber of the ark.  She’s found it. She rolls out the dough and places it on the baking sheet.  There are two loaves of chocolate-chip-bacon glory lying there beside each other like the Ten Commandments.  I try to read them.  They only say, “BACON!”

After the first baking, the house is filled with a smell not of this earth, an ambrosia odor.  She takes them out to inspect and cool, then places them back in the oven for the final bake.

Before they are finished, I am fast asleep on the couch, dreaming of adventures.  The mixed fragrance of bacon and chocolate swirls in my mind and I awake euphoric.  In a daze, I walk upstairs to our bedroom and resist the temptation to devour them all.

In the morning I find them covered on the kitchen table.  As I lift the veil, the remaining scent whiffs into my nostrils.  I pick up one of the chocolate-laced fragments and eat it whole.

The flavor is everything I have been searching for, the perfect salty-sweet.  But then, this happens…

*Good enough to melt your face off.

Check out our menu for more delish options.  Taking any of them to your holiday party will be like taking a gun to a sword fight.

Ingredients:

7-8 Thick sliced bacon strips
2 cups all-purpose flour
1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1/4 teaspoon salt
3/4 cup granulated sugar
1/2 cup (1 stick) unsalted butter, softened
2 large eggs
1 cup semisweet chocolate chips

Directions:

1. Fry bacon in skillet until browned and crisp. Transfer to paper towel-lined plate to drain. Allow bacon to cool completely.  Chop bacon (Original recipe suggested using food processor, if you do, you have bacon powder – good for some things, not this).
2. Whisk flour, baking powder, and salt in medium bowl. In large bowl, beat butter and sugar with electric mixer until light and fluffy, two or three minutes. Add eggs one at a time and beat to combine. Add flour mixture and beat until blended. Stir in bacon and chocolate chips. Gather dough in ball and divide in half. Wrap each half in plastic and refrigerate until firm, 20 to 30 minutes.
3. Line baking sheet with parchment paper. Preheat oven to 350ºF. On floured surface, roll each piece of dough out into a 12 to 14-inch log. Transfer logs to baking sheet spacing them 3 to 4 inches apart. Bake until light golden and dry to the touch, about 30 minutes.
4. Remove baking sheet from oven. Reduce oven temperature to 300ºF. Allow logs to cool for 15 minutes. Transfer logs to cutting board. Using serrated knife, slice logs on diagonal into 1/2-inch thick slices. Return slices to baking sheet, standing upright, and bake until dry and golden, 20 to 30 minutes.

Adapted from Seriouseats.com